[bond of flames 2.0]

Thats nice. I don't think i can make this one serious.

A guy just came out of a shitty marriage and his wife got everything. Well one day he came across a garage sale and bought an old lava lamp and rubbed it and a genie appeared. The genie said that he would grant him 3 wishes but his wife would get the same thing just 2x better than what he got. Well the guy thought about it and said.
1. I wish I was the richest guy in the Country. *BAM* He was the Richest guy in the states but she was the richest woman in the world.
2. I wish I was the handsomest guy in the country. *BAM* he is now Mr. America and she became Miss Universe.

Well he thought reall hard about his wish. And finally it came to him.
3. I wish I was beaten "half" to death. Well he lapsed into a coma and well as for her...

Same deal...Dude gets divorced and looses everything. He meets a genie that says he'll grant three wishes but his wife gets that just doubled. Well he wishes to rich she is now twice as rich. He wishes to be good looking she wins Miss America. Then he thinks and then wishes to be beaten half to death. Her funeral was a week later.