So, I've been saying up late at night speaking to a friend of mine, hereby referred to as SWG (long story, but I know what it means, you don't need to :P). Now, by late at night I mean anything up to 5/6 in the morning.
Today I have seen the effects of this bad influence. I am not in school. I missed the bus, was late out, had to go back to get my organiser and bus money, started back to the bus stop and the bus went. Now, I could have gotten the next bus, considering it was only 20-30 minutes later. No. I came home, phoned school, made out I was talking to my stepmother and said I'd be late. Jill is, in fact, out all day today at college then the gym.
You may think it is weird I refer to his bad influence, in this case - and you would probably be right. But SWG actively encourages me to skip lessons, and he himself missed a godawful lot of school in his day.
I decided "Hmmm, maybe he'll be online *checks* *gets glued to the computer*" and now here I am whining about it. Hahaha. Oops.
Not really whining just... It is not healthy =P I am moderately worried that I would skip a whole day to talk to someone I only fancy when I have huge feelings for someone else (even as pissed off with this someone else as I am) so it makes me double take.
Admittedly, SWG has cheered me up. A LOT. Whenever I was mad or upset about something, he'd cheer me up - unlike someone else I can think of, who was, much of the time, the cause of my being brought down.
You know, the reason I am writing this is because I've been reading an anger management book. Apparently, you're supposed to EXPRESS your emotions. Constructively. But y'all know me - I'm one to leave it until someone makes one wrong statement and POP! goes the weasel.
But back to the story.
So, it turns out SWG has "personal feelngs" towards me - which shocks me immensely, as he is generally impersonal and indeed a huge asshole to a lot of people. By shocks me immensely, I mean I kind-of already knew, of course. Haha. I am usually blind in instances like this, but he hints at it rather than saying anything. Until, of course, we were playing twenty questions and, in return of me answering a question for him, he promised to answer one question for me without beating around the bush, only partially answering etc; in effect, truthfully, to-the-point and extremely concise. The thing I am about to show isn't that, but logs from later on.
Quote:
Kitty(kins?): why all the pussyfooting to find out how i feel about you? (i suck at thinking of questions soit just came to that)
SWG: because it's an important issue to me
Kitty(kins?): way to answer my question without answering, go you
SWG: hey, I did give an answer >=O
*About five minutes passed here, in which he asked me a question*
Kitty(kins?): hmm
Kitty(kins?): whys it an important issue? (i'll think of better thngs to ask eventaully honest)
SWG: because I try not to develop personal feelings towards someone. This way, if things go badly, I can cut loose without leaving any permanent damage behind
SWG: of course, it's already too late for that now, so I'm being fairly direct
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That's all I am showing from the logs, lol. I mean, none of you know him (or even, really, me) so it wouldn't be fair.
So yes! Snags confused now. Oh wait, that isn't much different from normal...^_~ Just post if you want or something. Lol.
Oh, dear.
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